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LILGRL PERMALINK* November 21, 2009 3:32 pm dana –

that’s not necessarily true. i agree that you will not be attracted to a man who shares your interests if you are excessively feminine, but i know plenty of men and women who have found extremely compatible mates by simply embracing these differences. certainly, all “soulmate” couples are not comprised of people who share exactly the same (masculine) interests.

СОФИЯ/sofia PERMALINK November 21, 2009 3:37 pm Actually, variety keeps things interesting. I’ve been out on dates with guys who have the exact same opinions as me, enjoy the same interests, like the same music, movies, etc. and it is BORING.

I like to be challenged by someone, and some guys I’ve dated expressed the same thing. We learn from each other, and it also gives us time to do “alone” stuff.

dana PERMALINK November 21, 2009 3:38 pm lilgirl,

i would venture to say they are able to do that because they have some bedrock principle or abiding interest they share in common that overrides the differences, like a strongly shared religion, a business they are devoted to together or neutral hobby/interest–like a shared obsession with skiing. there has to be a deep shared well of SOMETHING or the word “compatibility” doesn’t apply.

you can only embrace differences and be compatible if the differences are somehow reconcilable–women have now created an entire philosophical/political worldview and embrace it that literally puts them at odds with if not in a state of actual enmity with the majority of men, mutually incompatible 1st premises can’t possibly lead to “compatibility” under any definition of the word.